Amin

Join " what kind of doctor could you be?" quiz in Facebook and suddenly surprised with the result.

What shown as my result was similar with my goal.

What kind of doctor I could be?

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An Oncologist

"An oncologist specializes in dealing with cancer. It's a challenging, and often heart-breaking, medicine to practice. You have to be good at empathizing with people, but also a strong attention to detail, and a general passion for science (how else will we ever find a cure?). You also have to have a strong emotional foundation to deal with the everyday tragedy - and to really be overjoyed at the news of remission and recovery."

Could I be?

Think the opposite, girl!

Whatever all ladies were thinking on their relationships, they were looking at it the wrong way. Ladies might feel secure by their intellectual capacity, independency, empathy, and caring attitude. But hey, those are not not something a guy would look for. At least, those are not the most important thing.

According to a guy I respect, guys look for comfort. They already handle stressful decisions throughout the day working, they don't need anymore arguments that would only show how intelligent the girl is, or any issues that force them to use the brain heavily. They need comforting conversations, they need not whines nor complicated story on how the girl dealt with her insecurities. 

So we might be dealing with this stuff wrong all along. 

The question I have yet been able to answer is the fact that ladies love to share a lot of things, including how her day went, or how frustrating the work was, etc. How do you then combine these two contrasting tendencies?

Kuning bungkam

Bukankah kau memanggilku sahabat
Lalu mengapa masih saja kita sama-sama lebih terbuka kepada yang lain?
Mengapa kita saling membiarkan dunia membaca kisah kita,
Tapi tak sedikit pun terbuka satu sama lain.

Mengapa kita saling terluka,
Tanpa saling menguatkan, sahabat kuningku?

Tumbuh

Aku sedang bertumbuh. Sedang di persimpangan. Di tempat di mana menjadi naif dan menerima realita beradu pandangan. Rasanya ingin aku jadi kerdil saja. Tidak perlu bertumbuh dalam suasana serba tidak nyaman begini. Aku terus ingin berkubang dalam kolam kenyamanan, tanpa perlu menggubris lalu lalang orang yang berkeliaran. Tanpa perlu mendengar dan peduli cemooh orang.

Aku benci bertumbuh. Tapi aku harus. Aku tidak punya pilihan. 

Kalau aku benar ingin jadi lilin, aku perlu dibakar untuk dapat memberi guna. 

Dan sekali saja berpikir dunia ini tidak melulu mengenai diriku.

Sedang Sepi

It is always easy to feel that you are broken; to be the victim; to feel weak as if everything is beyond your control. There are in fact too many times I let my emotions define who I am. 

Things went different way this time. It is no longer a good type of 'peeling' anymore. You have come to the scar, and for sure it is nothing convenient. You have come to the idea of losing, of letting go if things go unwell.

Weird, but you feel nothing but ready. Is that even a sign?

Things are Getting Better

Hi, kind people who have a lot of spare time to read my blog! hehe.

On 4-7th September 2014, my 4 friends (ya you can read it as 3 best friends and 1 boyfriend) and I joined Asia-Pacific Global Health Conference at AIMST University, Malaysia. We came to present our 3 posters (from only 10 selected abstracts around the world, Hallelujah). Besides presenting posters, we also attended many keynotes, joined Medical Olympiad and workshops, and get a lot of new friends from other countries. Five of us trying to boost our University and Indonesia, but in fact, the acceptance of our friends in Indonesia is in contrast with what we expected. 

Do they envy? Then why?

You also have the opportunity, what matters is how you use that opportunity as much as possible.

IDC! Anyway, it's an honor to have my university's name&logo in an international event!

I will try harder, be more widen my wings, jump as high as the stars. Because all the prayers and advice of my parents are stronger than all the insults from people around me.

Wish me luck!

Woman is The Reflection of...

"My wife got sick. She was constantly nervous because of problems at work, personal life, her failures and children. She lost 30 pounds and weighted about 90 pounds. She got very skinny and was constantly crying. She was not a happy woman. She had suffered from continuing headaches, heart pain and jammed nerves in her back and ribs. She did not sleep well, falling asleep only in the mornings and got tired very quickly during the day. Our relationship was on the verge of a break up. Her beauty was leaving her somewhere, she had bags under her eyes, she was poking her head, and stopped taking care of herself. She refused to shoot the films and rejected any role. I lost hope and thought that we’ll get separated soon… But then I decided to act. After all I’ve got the MOST Beautiful Woman on earth. She is the idol of more than half of men and women on earth, and I was the one allowed to fall asleep next to her and to hug her. I began to shower her with flowers, kisses and compliments. I surprised and pleased her every minute. I gave her a lot of gifts and lived just for her. I spoke in public only about her. I incorporated all themes in her direction. I praised her in front of her own and our mutual friends. You won’t believe it, but she blossomed. She became better. She gained weight, was no longer nervous and loved me even more than ever. I had no clue that she CAN love that much. And then I realized one thing: the woman is the reflection of her man.

If you love her to the point of madness, she will become it."

-Brad Pit